


Described Affection

by consultingdetectivesherlockh



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: M/M, One Shot, Online Dating, i think, ohwell, taggin i cant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-11
Updated: 2013-01-11
Packaged: 2017-11-25 02:15:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/634040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/consultingdetectivesherlockh/pseuds/consultingdetectivesherlockh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The only way John could think of getting him to stop criticizing his relationships was to let him choose who was an acceptable other half. There were few ways to do that. He was thinking it over when Sherlock sighed dramatically and positioned himself next to John on the couch.</p>
<p>	“If you are so frustrated about getting a date, why don’t you just sign up on an online dating site?” Sherlock said. He grabbed John’s laptop and typed in an unfamiliar web address.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Described Affection

John was tired of Sherlock’s constant berating about his dating life. It was none of his business if the women he brought home were uneducated or boring, and even if it was, he most certainly did not want Sherlock to be involved. He would raise hell in any relationship that seemed to last beyond the third date by calling John, texting, demanding everything from John constantly. Sometimes, John thought his friend’s constant interruption of his love life stemmed from the jealousy that boiled inside him whenever he saw John with a woman. It was flattering but it needed to stop. He needed a way to get Sherlock to leave him alone.

At first, John couldn’t think of anything. Talking to him didn’t work; neither did reverse psychology, threats, violence, or pleas. He needed to be clever. The only way John could think of getting him to stop criticizing his relationships was to let him choose who was an acceptable other half. There were few ways to do that. He was thinking it over when Sherlock sighed dramatically and positioned himself next to John on the couch.

“If you are so frustrated about getting a date, why don’t you just sign up on an online dating site?” Sherlock said. He grabbed John’s laptop and typed in an unfamiliar web address. John groaned, but internally cheered for this chance to get Sherlock off of his back. He went to the kitchen, made a cuppa, and returned to find that ‘his’ profile was already created, and extremely accurate. There were a few blank sections on it.

“I wasn’t completely certain about the type of woman you find attractive, so I left those parts of the profile open. Would you like me to complete it for you?” Sherlock eyed the tea, took a sip, and returned it to its owner.

“No, no. I can do it,” John replied. He reached for the computer, but was stopped by a slap on the hand.

“You take hours to type, John. Let me do it.” John stifled a laugh. Maybe reverse psychology would work when dealing with the detective.

“Fine. Just put on what I say, alright?”

“Alright.”

“Erm, well, I like dark hair. And not too short. Actually, tall is fine.”

“Isn’t that a bit awkward with your height?”

“Oh, shut up. Fair skin’s okay, too. Actually, I’m not sure. You fill in it.”

“John.”

“What?”

“You just described me.”

“Oh,” John flushed. He sipped at his tea and avoided Sherlock’s gaze. Silence settled between them. John looked over and before he could protest, Sherlock pressed his lips to John’s. I’m not gay, I’m not gay, I’m not, oh he’s a bit good at this. John’s hands played with Sherlock’s curls. He could feel a purr rising up Sherlock’s chest when he pulled away.

“Was that right?” Sherlock pressed. John closed the laptop and nodded.

“Very.”


End file.
